


The Dragon and The Sun

by Mel90S



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Angst, Crossdressing, Depression, Early Joseon era, Guilt, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Rituals, Shamanism, everyone gets a mention - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:28:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27709765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mel90S/pseuds/Mel90S
Summary: Juho, a nobleman's only son preparing for his civil service exams, finds himself bewitched by a mysterious shaman in the forest.
Relationships: Baek Juho | Zuho/Lee Jaeyoon
Comments: 3
Kudos: 7





	The Dragon and The Sun

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place in early Joseon Period when Confucianism was the religion of the ruling class and the foundation of Joseon society, while shamanism was derided as superstition for women, children, and the ignorant lower classes.  
> Everything I know about this came from Google and research papers I found, so please excuse my artistic license.

“Please, father! You don’t need to do this!” Juho begged on his knees.

The nobleman stared coldly down at his son, “Don’t you understand? I am doing this for your own good. The path you were travelling would only lead to ruin, for yourself and this family. Need I remind you that you are your mother’s only child? Do you want her to suffer because of you?”

Juho choked back a sob. He could never do anything to hurt his mother. Having lost two sons before him, she doted heavily on him all throughout his childhood, and he had always tried his best to return the favor. Hearing his father’s accusations pierced his heart like an arrow. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. He hadn’t meant to fall in love.

But how could he not love him?

Jaeyoon, the sun that illuminated his life.

It had been pure coincidence that he stumbled upon him in the forest that day. The sound of the drumming drawing him in, separating him from his bodyguard and servant, until he heard that sweet honey voice singing and chanting.

Breaking through the clearing, he laid eyes on Jaeyoon for the first time. His heart paused its beating as the man came into view, his fervent dancing mesmerizing Juho into stillness. He could not say how long he watched, captivated, before Youngbin appeared at his side, breaking the enchantment and reminding him of their journey still ahead.

He was on his way to stay with his uncle to study along with his cousin Inseong for several months before the civil service exams. Juho’s father had insisted that he needed to see some of the world, and this was his first foray out of the sheltered life he had known. It was his mother’s insistance that he should take Youngbin along as his bodyguard, since his manservant Rowoon did not have the requisite skills to fight off any bandits that might attack along the way.

They did not encounter any bandits, but Youngbin was able to provide some context for what Juho had observed.

“That was a shaman priest,” Youngbin said as they returned to where Rowoon was anxiously waiting, “probably communing with the spirits of this forest.”

Juho had not expected his bodyguard to know so much about the folk religion, but he pestered him the rest of the journey for more information, which he readily supplied.

He quickly learned to avoid asking his uncle or teachers about shamanism.

“Why would you ever want to know about that? Confucianism is beautiful, structured and intellectual. Shamanism is wild, uncultured, and emotional. It is not for the likes of us.”

Juho nearly forgot about the shaman in the busyness of his studies, until Inseong dragged him into the village to participate in the festivities that accompanied the end of the sowing season.

There he saw him for the second time, bare chest glistening with sweat as he grappled with his opponent in a wrestling match. Juho stopped in his tracks, disbelieving his luck in stumbling upon the shaman again while admiring the skill with which the man twisted his weight as he fell to pull out a victory from what seemed like a sure defeat.

“Father won’t let me wrestle anymore, too dangerous” Inseong’s voice sounded wistful, “I was good too.” He tugged at Juho’s arm, “Come on, let’s find something delicious to eat.”

When Juho fell ill a couple weeks into the summer, Youngbin suggested seeking out a shaman in spite of Rowoon’s nervous protests. Juho never found out how the swordsman located Jaeyoon and snuck him into his quarters.

Breaking through his fevered delirium to the sight of Jaeyoon’s dimpled smile, he thought he had entered heaven. However, the gentle kiss he gave him was _oh so_ real and left Juho hungering for more.

“No, I don’t usually kiss sick people,” Jaeyoon laughed when asked about it later, “I just couldn’t resist you.”

The sentiment went both ways. Juho couldn’t get enough of Jaeyoon.

The wide smile that became his own little haven from the world. The strength of the arms that held him. The press of those soft lips against his own.

They would seek out each other multiple times a week, Youngbin going above and beyond his duties to facilitate their secret trysts in the forest.

Jaeyoon filled his life with a contagious joy. Juho drank in the stories he told about a world so far removed from his own.

He could feel the salt spray of the ocean as Jaeyoon talked about going out on his friend Dawon’s fishing boat to intercede with water spirits. He laughed at the stories of Hwiyoung and Chani, the orphan boys Jaeyoon fed and attempted to keep out of trouble with the law, and he commiserated with Jaeyoon’s constant struggle trying to beat off his little sister’s potential suitors, especially that ‘pretty boy’ Taeyang, who had enough girls chasing after him and was therefore clearly a player and definitely not good enough for her.

“Is anyone ever going to be good enough for her?” Juho asked as they lay side by side in the soft grass, illuminated by the full moon.

Jaeyoon just laughed and declined to answer, starting on a new story. “Hey, did I tell you about the three-legged cat Hwiyoung found?”

The stories could go on for hours or at least until Juho finally succumbed to the power of Jaeyoon’s lips and ended the storytelling with his kisses.

He found great inspiration from every moment he spent with him. Poetry poured out of him, filling pages with his calligraphy.

“Wow, I really need to meet the girl you’re hiding from me,” Inseong remarked after reading one of his poems.

“There is no girl.”

“Pfft, I don’t believe you. There’s no way you just think this stuff up.” He gazed at Juho thoughtfully, “I mean, look at you. You’re practically glowing these days.”

His teachers were likewise impressed, pleased to see that he had finally found his niche. But Juho kept his best work secret, only meant for Jaeyoon’s ears as he read his poems to him in their quiet sanctuary.

“You really are the sun that illuminates my world,” Juho murmured against Jaeyoon’s chest, basking in the warmth emanating from his person, “the sun to my dragon.”

“Sun?” Jaeyoon threw a troubled glance at him, “and dragon?”

Juho looked up at him and smiled, “Oh, it’s just something Youngbin told me, about how in the old days, instead of the ‘sun and moon’ or the ‘dragon and tiger’ to describe male and female relationships, they would call two men ‘the dragon and the sun.’ I thought that was beautiful.”

Jaeyoon stiffened beneath him, the hand that had been caressing his hair pulling away from him. 

“Why, what’s the matter?” Juho grew concerned with every passing second of silence. He didn’t think he’d ever seen the man look so worried.

“I-I,” Jaeyoon’s voice trembled, “It’s just that Mother had a dream a-about a dragon and the sun. Months ago, before I met you. She was so sure it was a premonition, but we never could figure out what the dragon was supposed to represent.”

“What was it?” the fact that Jaeyoon was suddenly avoiding his eyes, troubled Juho. The night air chilled and he shivered.

“In the dream the dragon consumed the sun, leaving everything on earth to wither and die.” The words came softly, regretfully. An oppressive silence filled the air between them. Jaeyoon slowly stood up and brushed the fallen leaves off his clothes, “I’m sorry, Jju, I need to go home.”

Juho watched helplessly as he left, disappearing into the trees.

The light had gone out of his life.

Surely that dream had nothing to do with him. He understood why it might scare Jaeyoon, but there was no way he would let any harm fall on the man he’d grown to love.

The world spun dizzyingly around him. Time passed slowly, one miserable day after another. He couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. Rowoon worried over him like a mother hen, but it was useless.

Juho would have done anything for Jaeyoon, and yet, the man did not trust him.

He had given up hope when Jaeyoon’s talisman suddenly appeared in their tree again, indicating that he wanted to meet.

Juho was a bundle of nerves the entire day, waiting impatiently for the sun to set, so he could go to the man.

“Hyung!” he greeted Jaeyoon breathlessly, having practically run to their meeting place, “You know I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, right?”

“Shhh,” Jaeyoon kissed him, fire burning in his eyes, “It’s okay, my dragon. We’re going to fight it.” He grabbed Juho’s hand, intertwining their fingers, and pulled him deeper into the forest.

They walked for over an hour, Juho clinging to the Jaeyoon’s hand like a lifeline until they arrived at a rocky cliff overlooking the sea. A shrine was set up at the spot, and a lady was arranging candles.

“Mother,” Jaeyoon greeted her, “Juho, this is my mother. She’s going to help.”

Juho bowed, but she lifted his face and kissed his cheek. It was easy to see the resemblance; her gentle smile and sparkling eyes were replicated in her son.

Her son who was at that moment stripping off his clothes a short distance away.

Juho’s mouth went dry, and he suddenly felt very hot, “Wha-what?”

“Don’t worry,” Jaeyoon’s mother assured him. “You don’t need to do a thing. Just stand here. We’ll do all the work.” She went back to the candles and lit them.

Juho stared in wonder at Jaeyoon’s transformation. Now dressed entirely in women’s clothing, the moon illuminating the white material, the shaman priest looked like a ghost, mysterious and alluring.

Jaeyoon’s mother started beating the drums and chanting. Juho kept his eyes locked on Jaeyoon as he began swaying to the beat and joined in the chant. Ribbons flowed through the man’s fingers like water, and his fan flicked back and forth rhythmically.

All concept of time disappeared as the beat of the drums quickened and Jaeyoon’s dancing became wilder and less restrained. The ribbons weaved intricately through the air between and around the two men, growing shorter until Jaeyoon was pressed against Juho, bound together by the ribbons. Juho’s breathing shifted to match the rise and fall of Jaeyoon’s chest as they melted into each other.

Jaeyoon’s eyes were glazed over, and Juho just managed to catch him as his knees buckled under him. The spell broken, Juho passed a worried gaze over the unconscious man as he laid him down on the soft grass.

“Is he okay?” Juho asked Jaeyoon’s mother, his voice laden with concern.

“He will be,” she assured him with a smile, “my boy has a very open soul that makes him a good conduit for the gods. It makes him more likely to end up like this for a while after such a ritual.” She set herself to the task of making tea while they waited and pressed Juho for information about himself and his life.

“I have to admit, I was worried about your intentions towards my son,” she said, pouring a cup for him, “but Jaeyoon, well, I’ve never seen him more driven than he was these past several days, trying to find a way to fix your fates.”

“Did it work?” Jaeyoon’s voice was hoarse as he regained consciousness.

Juho helped him sit up and his mother handed him a bowl of rice and some tea.

“If this didn’t, then nothing would,” she said. “You did magnificently.”

Jaeyoon beamed at her praise and shoveled the food into his mouth hungrily.

They took their time going back.

The time they had been apart had proven too much for them, and they wanted to make the rest of the night count. The sun was already rising by the time Juho slipped back into his uncle’s house.

He shouldn’t have returned.

He shouldn’t have left Jaeyoon’s side.

Uncle had written to Father about Juho’s behavior over the past several days and now Father was here to take him home.

Juho panicked.

He couldn’t leave without an explanation… without a promise to return… without saying _I love you._

And so he ran. Back into Jaeyoon’s arms. Leading his father straight to his lover.

The next few hours were a nightmare. He watched helplessly as Jaeyoon was dragged unceremoniously away, flogged, and thrown in jail. He begged Father for mercy, tears burning his eyes, and stomach heaving until there was nothing left in it to expel.

It was all his fault. He had destroyed his sun.

“You will be okay,” Juho’s father assured him. “You just need to be away from the influence of his witchcraft, and you will be back to your old self in no time.”

He was wrong.

No matter what Juho did over the years, no matter how many women or men he slept with, he could not erase the memory or guilt of his first love.

He disgusted himself.

He poured his emotions into poetry. It gave him notoriety. His poetry spoke to people, and they heaped praises on him.

He did return to the village to try to find out Jaeyoon, to attempt to make amends, but no one was able to say what had become of him or his family.

What was the use of fame, if he couldn’t use it to find the one person that he loved? He traveled from city to city, town to town, village to village, sharing his poems and looking for his muse.

He was getting old.

He couldn’t keep up this pace.

He was running out of time.

Juho picked up his brush and wrote one last poem.

All of the words he had said to Jaeyoon. Those secret thoughts that he had withheld from his teachers way back then flowed out onto the page.

He had copies made and sent all over the country. Even if he never saw Jaeyoon again, he hoped that the words would reach him. That Jaeyoon would know that he had never stopped searching. If he was even still alive.

He packed up a change of clothes, some food, and his brushes and ink. Rowoon met him in the courtyard with a pair of saddled horses, and they set off together.

They travelled for days, the going much slower due to the aches and pains that accompanied their advanced age.

It had been so long since he had been there, and Juho was not completely sure that he was even in the right place, but he couldn’t go any further. He and Rowoon constructed a makeshift shelter and settled in.

He tried to tell Rowoon that he was fine, that his duties were done, and he could go home, but his faithful servant refused to leave his side.

Days passed, then weeks and months. Juho watched the seasons change the appearance of the sea beneath the cliff, lost in his memories.

He heard the footsteps, different from Rowoon’s familiar gait. Tears filled his eyes as the visitor took his seat next to him on the grass.

“All around the world?”

“I’ve been searching for you,” Juho whispered.

Jaeyoon reached out and turned Juho’s face towards his.

“I love you too, my dragon.”


End file.
